Coming Home

Thanksgiving! HooHaa! If there is a holiday that feels more like home you could have fooled me. Christmas? Maybe if you are a Kardasian and narcissistic consumption is your religion. July 4? It's hard to go wrong with cookouts and bombs, but the nationalism can be a little more 3rd Reich than Bob Vila. (Does anyone remember Bob Vila?) Easter? Torture, death, zombies, and chocolate eggs, it's sort of like my family gatherings but I'm looking for something a little warmer. New Years? No day that involves puking need apply. Valentines? Ditto ( does anyone remember ditto machines?) for any day that bums out as many people as it makes happy. Nope Thanksgiving is the best.

Thanksgiving! Heehaw!

We need thanksgiving, because we need "Home". Sore loser Republicans are right, "It's not your grandpa's, Hell, it's not your pa's America anymore." I find this mostly a good thing; no need to bring back racism, sexism, the cold war... I could go on but you get my point. But the new America comes with its' own set of problems. Nothing feels like home anymore. On the job front you are averaging 13.3 jobs over your lifetime . As far as residences go the number is around 16. At these rates can you even recognize the woman sitting across from you at the breakfast table? I'm not even going to mention your 600 friends on facebook because nobody has 600 real friends. You have nothing anchoring you to a place, you bop around more than an aborigine during a drought, and you are backed up with "friends" that you wouldn't recognize if they were sitting next to you. That's not home, thats a Dali painting.

Although it does remind me of my 9th birthday party.

When I was a wee lad my Dad was a high school principal, but not in the town where we lived. Every Thanksgiving he would take me to the football game and we would watch the action from a school window. At half time we would go down to the field, mingle with the crowd, have a hot dog, but while the game was going on it was just me and Dad. I didn't get much one on one time with the old boy as a kid, there were 3 other brothers to compete with and a whole school full of youths that required his attention, but if I close my eyes and just breath my mind can conjure up every way those Thanksgivings felt. It felt like home. Too bad I got older and wanted to go to my hometown Thanksgiving games. He was waiting in the car when I told him I was going with the guys. He was cool, and a few years later he came to watch me (every game for 4 years) when I played myself, but that was really the last time me and Pop had something that was just for the 2 of us. Time flies, the world changes.

A million years later I was doing political work with a friend of mine when he introduced me to a bunch of younger, hopelessly progressive, not yet cynical group of democrats. One of them lived with a bunch of other late 20s post grads in a big rambling house in Somerville. They called it the Wilfred because that was what was printed on the doorknobs. The first thing you noticed was that the whole place smelled of books. I liked everyone well enough but I tend to be a rules guy and it seemed like I was too old to just hang there. Didn't want to be the creepy old guy. Well it turns out that the place had been a revolving group home for young adults for 20 years and every year they cooked a turkey and had a pot-luck and partied like it was 1968. I was persuaded to show up for parts 1 and 2 with the intention of leaving the partying to the young-uns. Turns out that no-one knew how to make gravy, or fix the kitchen lamp (I didn't either but it got me involved), or control my friend who was also too old but definitely not a rules guy.

Great meal!

So I made gravy, took a shot at the lamp, kept P from running amok and had a really great time. I went there for 4 more Thanksgivings until Tufts bought the place, kicked everyone out, and gutted it for housing. Everyone scattered literally across the globe, but it turns out the only rule about age was in my head, so if I close my eyes and just breath my mind can taste the gravy, smell the books and conjure up every way those Thanksgivings felt. It felt like home.

There are other things that make me feel that way. There was Rolling Green, The 466, Harwich house, Mark's, Meadow Ln, Oscar's, Mad River... many places, many circumstances, but always that sense that there is a place where you belong in this world. If modern times denies us one definitive spot in geographic space hadn't we better embrace the home that we can carry with us, that pops up in our path? When a pot luck comes your way go with it. We all need as much home as we can get.

Now when you get invited to a pot luck if you are the new kid you are probably going to get stuck bringing a vegetable. Face it, the host is going to be all about the meat, dessert is too important to leave to chance, nobody knows how to cook anymore so everybody will be backed up with salad,  vegetables it is. Now the important thing to remember about vegetables is that people don't really like them, but with a little thought you can make veggies taste great while removing all that nasty nutritional value.

It even looks like dessert.

Now if you are a punk you can just make the version from the Campbell's cream of mushroom soap can. People will eat it, some of those less fortunate than you will actually jones for it, but you are trying to create a "Home" moment and pre-made slop, no matter how tasty, does not say home. Put a little effort into it. Part of what gives things that extra edge that says "home" is effort.

1. Start by blanching a couple of fistfuls of fresh green beans. You know the drill if you have been reading this blog. Clean the beans, boil for 3 minutes, plunge into cold water to stop the cooking. Are they a vivid green with a nice snap to them? Good job!
2. Clean and slice a package of button mushrooms. Fry them in butter, Mmmm butter! (2 tablespoons full) until they give up their liquid and start to brown. Remove them to a bowl.
3. Cut a large onion in half then slice thin. Fry the onion in 2 tablespoons full of butter, Mmmm butter! until they turn golden.
4. Add some minced garlic, 2 or 3 cloves, fry for 30 seconds.
5. If things are looking dry add 2 more tablespoons of butter, Mmmm butter! and when it melts 2 tablespoons of flour.
6. Work it in the pan for at least 2 minutes to get the raw taste out of the flour.
7. Add whole mile, 1/2 and 1/2 would be better, stirring the whole while. Get it to a gravy consistency or the second cook will make it gummy. Gummy is always a bad idea.
8. Add the mushrooms and stir.
9. Add a serious pinch of salt+ other flavor enhancers. Soy sauce? Worcestershire? Noc ma? Tabasco? Sirracha? Go nuts.
10. Add a tablespoon full of chopped fresh thyme and stir.
11. Add the green beans. Mix well then find an attractive casserole that will hold the whole mess. Butter it, Mmmm butter! then add the beans.
12. Cover with foil and bake in a 350 degree oven for 30 minutes.
13. Now Funonions in a can are just fine, but what would be better is if you know a restaurant that makes good onion rings. Buy an order while you are transferring the cool casserole to your pot luck home activity. 
14. You have to reheat this bad boy so check with your host then pop it into a 350 oven after you spread the onion rings over the top.
15. When the onions are brown and the rest is bubbly pull it out of the oven. Unlike mashed potatoes this stuff will taste good even if it is not screaming hot so don't sweat it if people don't start eating right away.
16. High-five your new family.

Election Day

So after all the shouting, all the lying, all the promises, and all the money wasted election 2012 is finally upon us. WooHoo! This was easily the most divisive election since... since... since... the last one? Fine, well it is definitely the most important election... until... until... until... the next one? Damn you reality, always messing with our common knowledge. Still, this election minus the hyperbole deserves your attention. There are very real differences between the candidates. Mitt Romney ran as a right wing ideologue, but is really a corporate owned centrist. Obama has presented himself as a leftist healer but is really a corporate owned centrist. Amusingly being a corporate lackey still leaves a lot of play in the tone and reality of running the government so the two candidates  provide a clear voting choice to everyone but the 5 morons in Ohio that still can't make up their minds. So what if the difference between democrats and republicans is that democrats let poor people in on the stealing. It's still a major difference.  Good for those Ohio folks or this thing would just be a formality and all that media frenzy would be back on Snookie or Honey Boo boo.

The funny thing is that when this thing is over approximately 50% of Americans will believe that order has been restored and we will return to being the utopia we were when back viewed with rose colored glasses. The other 49% (got to factor out those 5 people in Ohio) will be sure that the only right thing to do is flee the coming demon apocalypse for some other place that they glimpsed with rose colored glasses.

...and everyone gets a pet monkey!

At least for one day everybody in the country is going to be wrong. Yeah, common ground! Don't mistake my point though. Choosing between Barack and Mitt is going to affect your daily life in hundreds, maybe thousands, of ways. Planning on a bacchanal of a retirement fueled by all that social security cash you have coming? See who's going to cut the most out of the program. Taking your sick kid to the emergency room? Will that be one option of many or a last desperate rush ahead of the Grim Reaper? Will you be making your own decisions about your lady parts or will the government be doing that for you? (careful, the anti-government party says I am using trick questions) Will you be making your own decisions about love and marriage or will the government be doing that for you? (careful, the anti-government party says I am using trick questions) Will the targeted executions of people we don't like in countries we are not at war with continue or... wait, that's one they both agree on. Will banks continue to be allowed to play roulette with your money or will they be allowed to play roulette with your money while getting stern looks from various regulating bodies? See, all kinds of real differences. So vote the difference but give up on the miracle results because most of the problems are about me and you.

Plain bellied loser!

We love to think we are special when what we really are is unique. Special is, "Hey universe! Look at me! Save your random cruelty for a lesser being. I am after all, special!". Unique is, " Breaking Dawn? of coarse Love, I'll still owe you 2 choices for the 3 times we saw Avengers." Every single American, every single resident of this globe, perhaps every sentient being in this universe is a unique combination of knowledge, experience, and desire that deserves the right to exercise their uniqueness as long as they don't cause harm to others (actual harm, not imagined harm fringe lunatics!). On the other hand every single American that thinks they are special because of their moral choices, taste, skin color, status, fame, wealth, education, background, etc, etc, etc is a narcissistic sociopath who diminishes themselves and makes the road forward more of a slog... and speaking of slogs...

...because I am the 1%

How are we going to fix the country if we like to think you can earn the right to be a dick!  Too many of us do. Even if we let you call yourselves "job creators" instead of "rich assholes" that really doesn't come with any bragging rights. For the foreseeable future, and despite wall streets experiments at eliminating this step, creating jobs is a necessary component of becoming wealthy. The more jobs created the more wealth created. You are not doing the rest of us a favor you self important jackass! Creating jobs is a generally  karma neutral situation that does not in debt us to you, free you from any social contract with your fellow citizens, or shield you from our right to negotiate for a bigger piece of that created wealth. The vast majority of us  have been  good employees and good citizens. Rich people owe us more than a paycheck. A little gratitude for helping you build stuff to start and we can work from there.   Why a bigger chunk of the 99% don't understand this mystifies me everyday.

1 state, 2 state, red state, blue state.

Of course if we are going to have a better tomorrow we are going to have to like the truth more than being right. When we don't like something we don't want negotiation or compromise we want something done about it. By rule of law if possible, by blunt force trauma if necessary. Mmmm! blunt force trauma! The other guy is always going to be the thug even if he is offering you free ice cream. "Free ice cream! Damn you! Don't you care about the obesity epidemic in this country? First it's a little free ice cream, then slowly everyday it's your birthday, until suddenly everyone is riding around on a pony and they're sick from too much candy whether they wanted to eat it or not. You bastard!" Free ice cream my ass! Note: both parties like to pay in ice cream since living wages, a future for our kids, and a comfortable retirement seem like pipe dreams.

Cut defense spending? Why, whatever for?

George McGovern died last month. He was a progressive liberal that served his country well in WW2. He was the first presidential candidate that I ever worked for. ( sadly Carter's was the first election I could vote in and despite his Nobel Prize Carter was no George McGovern). Why do I bring this up? Because when you folks get scared you want to kill some shit. Even lefty Senators like the late Teddy K who routinely voted against wars did not vote against war appropriations. 90% of you were behind Bush when he decided to blow up Iraq. At least 100,000 people died because you were scared. Now almost ten years late, and depending on what day of the week it is,  Mitt is banging the war drums for Iran while Obama is drone killing wedding parties in Afghanistan. The only peace politicians left are dudes like Dennis Kucinich and Ron Paul but it's hard to get traction in a general election when you are wearing a tin foil hat.  When you ever get serious about peace, and I am definitely talking to you collage kids and soccer moms as well as belligerent white males, maybe real change can happen. Rest in peace George.

The American dream for everyone, what could go wrong?

Even progressives in this country think that everyone, even in other countries, should be able to pursue the American dream. I will not be the one to say they shouldn't with one caveat. Unless we plan on some sort of technology breakthrough to produce exponentially more clean energy while simultaneously removing the waste, or severely redefineing what constitutes the American dream we will burn this planet to a crisp. Mmmm crisp! We are not serious about either of these choices. Republicans just put their hands in their ears, go La la la la la la, and wait for free markets to save the day. Democrats push for new technologies but drive home in their SUVs without addressing the consumerism, waste, and consumption that got us into our current state of affairs. Having more stuff = having a better life? No, just no. That's what corporations feed us and that is what we have been buying. I call shenanigans.

Monsanto says, "Trust us, it's just fine".

They feed us more than that. Think tanks find some dimwitted town that requires bike helmets for dogs.  PR firms make sure that information gets into the " all government is bad" narrative on talk radio and Fox news. Mainstream media outlets fearful that they will lose even more customers report the story as a referendum on government instead of as an amusing aside about a town full of dopes. Anti-regulation politicians rev up their constituents to elect them to office. Then a year later nothings changed in the dog helmet town, but the banks can still sell unregulated derivatives, Con Agra can genetically modify your food without telling you, Monsanto can spray Roundup next to your water supply, Weyerhaeuser and Plum Creek can clear cut the entire northwest, your pension can be funded by worthless credit default swaps... blah, blah, blah at least you won't have to buy a helmet for your dog.

No, not a 1%

You're tired, you're angry, you work hard every day, you play by the rules. You also made your own bed. You don't run for office, you don't read up on what the government is doing, you think that rich bastards that tool on you for 47 minutes will make your life better, you have a huge problem with government over-reach on health care but no problem with Guantanamo, domestic surveillance, and drone strikes in neutral countries, and you love, love, love buying stuff. Well you're getting played because you think being right and holding on to yours is more important that the solutions to our problems.

We're not done yet!

Vote Tuesday, support the status quo, but talk to your neighbors. With very few exceptions most people know that killing and cruelty are wrong, that anybody that says "Just trust me" doesn't deserve to be trusted, that the people that write your paycheck owe you a little more than just the cash they pay you, that it's wrong to deny access to health care to people that need it, that women... in fact everyone has a right to make their ownn decisions about their own bodies, that we don't need small government we need good government... I could go on but it would just be an ever growing list of things we almost all agree on. They have the money and the guns but if we stand together instead of joining tribes we have the power. No government has ever stood without the tacit consent of it's people, none. So what did you do when things went bad?