Having a Blue Blue Christmas

Christmas is the big Kahuna of holidays. A glorious mash-up of commerce, religion, and family that is only slightly less over the top than a gay pride parade through the middle of the Las Vegas strip. The war on Christmas? A secular-humanist attempt to destroy Christianity, or a corporate attempt to open the wallets of the non-christen rubes to the joys of (ahem) giving? Discuss among yourselves. Still there is also a downside to Christmas. You can feel it don't you? That slight nag in some back corner of your mind that not all is right with the world? Other holidays are pretty straight forward, at Thanksgiving you give thanks for what you have, on the 4th you celebrate the signing of the Declaration of Independence, on Memorial Day you remember those that died for our country, on Labor Day you get a hard earned day off, on New Years you say out with the old and in with the new, but Christmas... well they made it about giving. That's fine as far as it goes, but the corollary is that it is also becomes about "getting". Suddenly the things you don't have loom large. Spouse in Afghanistan? No heat in the apartment? Can't buy presents for the kids? Hell, do you need a hundred other things for the kids besides toys? Are you hungry? Alone? Just out of faith? Out of hope?

...without you!

That nag in the back corner of your mind? That's your soul telling you that things are out of control. That's your rational self wondering why you and your wife buy each other presents from your joint checking account when you're worried about money the rest of the year. That's your heart exclaiming "It's not a gift if you have to give it". That's your sartorial self wondering "Really? Another sweater?". Don't despair. The voice, the wondering, the exclaiming are all true. So what. The blue part of Christmas is what makes us great. A person that can wallow in excess and never worry or doubt isn't really a person at all.

Why they would probably ruin this beloved classic by making it into a loud special effects laden movie starring a latex covered Jim Carry.

Well, I have your back on this one. If you need more cognitive dissonance in order to become a better more evolved person that doesn't forget the poor and lonely during your hedonistic romp through Americas shopping venues I have just the recipe for you.

Standing rib roast, prime rib, short rib, butchers give it different names in different parts of the country. You want a 6 or 8 bone rib roast from the loin end of the cut. (If you don't know a butcher that you can trust to provide this item for you become a vegetarian.) Have the butcher bone the roast for you but make sure you keep the rack of ribs? Buy some butchers twine on the way out.

1. Pre-heat the oven to 375 degrees.
2. Let the roast and the bones stand on the counter for 45 minutes.
3. Liberally salt and pepper the roast and bones.
4. Fine chop 3 or 4 cloves of garlic and a tablespoon or 2 of rosemary leaves.
5. Keep running the knife threw the garlic and herb until you get almost a paste.
6. Slather the paste on the side of the ribs that would have been attached to the roast.
7. Attach the roast to the slathered ribs using the butchers twine.
8. The roast goes in a roasting pan ( of course a roasting pan, duh)! Ribs down.
9. Put it in the oven for 1 hour. Do not open the door!
10. Turn off the heat. Leave the roast in for 3 hours more. Do not open the door!
11. Turn the oven back on to 375 degrees. Do not open the door!
12. Did I mention to NOT OPEN THE DOOR!
13. After 30 minutes you should check the internal temperature of the roast with an instant read thermometer. You're going for 145 degrees. 
14. If the temperature is right put the roast on a cutting board to rest for ten minutes.
15. Turn on the broiler.
16. Deglaze the pan with a nice dry red wine.
17. Defat the deglazing liquid
18. Cut the twine and return the ribs to the pan. Broil for 3 minutes on each side.
19. Slice the meat.
20. Take the ribs out and separate between the bones.
21. Boil the deglazing liquid and serve as a jus with a horseradish sauce, or add it to a roux with some beef broth ( homemade if you have it but store bought won't offend me) for a voule(gravy).
22. Your oven has been out of commission all day so serve this with mashed potatoes, glazed carrots,  creamed spinach, and the best bread your local bakery can produce.

Now that you have eaten a meal that would make a dead man hard it's time to consider how you can live up to that voice in your head. The world is not a horrible place, but it is often sadder and crueler than it has to be. You have your work cut out for you.

Flipping Burgers.

Thanksgiving week got really interesting for the Occupy Wall Street movement. It seems that when it comes to peaceful protest being a damn dirty hippy drenched in patula oil and a smug sense of entitlement is way worse than being a fat, talk radio loving, dumb-ass sitting in a lawn chair while dressed like Paul Revere. All I have to say is in Occupy, 20 years old to 30 years old, in the Tea Party, 40 years old to 60 years old. Why is every protest an attempt to annoy the rest of us? I beat a dead horse a while ago so I have no problem doing it again,  the NRA is bat-shit crazy and they get everything they want from the comfort of their living-rooms. So why so many in the streets playing dress-up? "Child is father of the man". What? it's Wordsworth. Honest. Education is an important thing isn't it? And we educate ourselves don't we?

My heart leaps up when I behold 

   A rainbow in the sky:

So was it when my life began; 

So is it now I am a man; 

So be it when I shall grow old, 

   Or let me die!

The Child is father of the Man;

And I could wish my days to be

Bound each to each by natural piety.

Good stuff. The heart leaps for rainbows, it also leaps when there are dragons to slay whether they be Muslim Kenyan presidents or joblessness combined with crushing student loans. Compare the two types of dragons suggested here and then guess the group embracing which point of view needs to be restrained.

Not them! The damn dirty hippies!

If you have been reading this blog you know I am not particularly impressed with Occupy, but the Tea Party makes me vomit. I'll take dumb, idealistic, and nice over mean and soul dead every time. The sad thing is that both groups have legitimate gripes about our sovereign class. Rich people partnered with our government  rob the crap out of us every week. We get just enough to keep us begging for more, but not so little that we have nothing to lose with a revolt. Plus a face full of pepper spray will remind all participants that things may be bad but they can quickly get worse.  Mmmm pepper spray!

Besides, what did the 50 somethings tell the 20 somethings? "Study and go to collage, or you'll end up flipping burgers". Now after the kids took them up on that proposition, spent 4 years of their lives studying (unless you are a radio talk show host, or a pretend liberal columnist for the New York Times you realize that most people that have degrees did in fact work for them) and put themselves in debt to the tune of $50,000 to $150,000 dollars they are out flipping burgers. Mmmm burgers! Hold the catsup, I'll have pepper spray. Why the hell are they angry?

WTF! I'm flipping burgers!

So what do we have to learn from all this. Wait for it. Fat boy is going sideways here again... Well, 1) people that are out flipping burgers, or cleaning toilets, or cutting grass, should be ashamed of themselves. Losers! Those jobs are why we have illegal aliens 2) A collage education has no real value unless it gets you a job. Learning? Meh! I need money for Black Friday, Walmart is selling 3 sixty inch flat screens for $200 and I want me one.

Run away! Run away! They think we're with Occupy Wall Street!

So, to sum up, in America you better go to collage no matter what, collage entitles you to a job, a job where you make enough dinero to buy a flat-screen TV, if you don't get that job the flat-screen, or in real life an x-box, is something to use pepper spray on a crowd for, because promises were made damn it, and what kind of pointy headed loser learns things for fun or enrichment? America, What could possibly go wrong with a value set like that? At least we have burgers! Mmm, burgers!

It takes so little to live a happy life

Hamburgers are simple. Use meat with at least 20% fat. That's it, any ratio that's lower than that is going to be dry and tasteless by the time you are done. Do not use hamburger buns, they suck, but also do not use exotic rolls or breads. The roll should be fresh and soft; like a bulkie or a kaiser roll. Toasted white bread is also fine. Do not over work the meat when you form the patty. A one pound package is perfect, divide into forths, flatten with your palm, leave the edges square. Charcoal outside, cast iron skillet inside, make 'em hot. Salt and pepper your burgers, one minute, flip, one minute, flip, one minute, flip, one minute, flip, one minute, flip, add cheese now, one minute done medium rare yeah! 2 more flips get you to medium, 2 more after that get you to medium well, 2 more to (yuck) well. Dummy, the cheese is only after the last flip.

Christmas is coming. Can I just do Thanksgiving again?

Thanksgiving!

Dear Dad,

It's almost Thanksgiving. We lost Christmas to the corporations years ago, Valentines day is either depressing or extortion depending on your relationship status, the 4th is fun but can get a little jingoistic at times, Easter is on a Sunday (What! no day off!), Memorial day gets sadder every year as we continue to add to the reason for Memorial Day (Out of Afghanistan by 2015!), and Labor day is officially and only the last day of summer( move along people, nothing to see here). Thanksgiving is the real deal though. There's sports and cooking and family and religion and history and eating and pie. It's the only holiday that comes with pie. I love pie! Mmmm pie. Remember Mom's pumpkin pies? Mmmm pie!

I'm in a bit of a quandary this year. I just don't feel that thankful for things. Not the way I have in the past. The weird thing is I don't really have anything to complain about. Well, other than my height, my weight, my social status, my finances, my love life, my age, my job, and my perception of the human race I have nothing to complain about. Still I'm wicked handsome in a chubby bald way, I'm wicked smart as long as you don't keep score by success or achievement, and I can buy as much ice cream as I want. Mmmm ice cream! So life's not perfect, so what! I was raised a Red Sox fan back when being a Red Sox fan was both a calling and a cross to bare. Now they have a couple of championships under their belts and they're just another bunch of overpaid jackoffs. I have 35 years of exquisite failure under my belt.

I was about to say that you must know what I'm talking about but you were a Cubs fan. 35 years of a crap team losing and then losing some more. Red Sox fans got to almost win year after year. Always good, sometimes great, but unfortunately not great enough. What better way to learn about life in America than to root for a team that is always... just... reaching... for... the... brass...

No! It's Bucky F@#king Dent!

So I'm not bumming on the thanks part of Thanksgiving because life doesn't always go well. Not going well is unfortunately an integral part of life. I think I'm bumming on the thanks part of Thanksgiving because I'm being a wussy boy and I'm refusing to roll with reality. Because the reality of life is also the fact that while you don't always win sometimes you get...

Fair Ball! Fair Ball! Fisk homers! Red Sox win!

We didn't even win that series but that homer is still one of the greatest sports moments ever. I know I'll remember it long after the latest world series wins jumble together is the fog of time. We don't give thanks for winning do we? We give thanks for great moments. We give thanks for the special stuff that just doesn't happen that often. We give thanks for the things that are important to us. Boston teams have played in 27 championship series since 1966 which is when I was first old enough to pay attention. They have won 16 times yet the things that stay with me are...

No! It's Aaron F@#king Boone!

I know Pop, maybe I am a bit of a cups half full guy, maybe I'd be even more thankful for things if I had been a Cubs fan. Then I'd be doing back flips for the victories instead of philosophizing about the misses. Maybe. Still, most of it is misses isn't it? Even the Yankees lose in the end more often than they win.

Mom still misses you. She hasn't cooked a Thanksgiving dinner since you died. I think Thanksgiving is extra tough on her because it was your favorite. This year is extra bad. Your granddaughter tried to commit suicide last friday. Thankfully she's all right if in a lot of pain. I don't think Mom understands, she probably can't imagine anything being more painful than losing you ( I tend to agree), but she doesn't understand how lost modern kids wallowing in modern culture can be. Obsessed with material things but never really having to earn them, sold on the idea that you shouldn't have to be uncomfortable ever, and sheltered from the real world by the endless supply of media available to stave off any actual thinking they just aren't ready when reality rears its' ugly head. Maybe we should have all been Red Sox fans.

No! It's Bill F@#king Buckner!

I wish you could talk to her Dad. You always had a talent for distilling things down to the basic gist, perhaps essence is a better word, of what people were feeling. I would just sound like a clueless adult if I tried. Hope things are good where you are (No, don't tell me. I'll find out eventually). I'm still plugging, and I guess still thankful, I just wish I could pass that on to the people that need it.

...and the horse he came in on!

Really Fat Boy? 3 Posts in a row?

I don't want to keep posting about how dumb we are. There are other dead horses to beat and there are other things to talk about. For example, if you are a right winger who wanted Bill Clinton gone shouldn't you be angry at Herman Cain? If you are a left winger isn't what Herman Cain did his own personal business between him, his wife, and his accusers? No left wingers, what Bill Clinton did was absolutely sexual harassment if nothing else simply by the uneven power and status between him and his conquests. The fact that Lewinsky was an intern and  Paula Jones was a secretary makes it harassment even if there was no direct consequence. When someone has power over you there is an implied risk in thwarting their will. Right, Left, either side will try to have it both ways, but that makes them  criminals or dumb-asses... oops, I was going to talk about something other than how dumb we are... sorry.

It's hard not to think about how dumb we are though. I was watching the Pats game at the Grog last Sunday and everyone around me seemed to be dumb enough to think the Pats can win another Super Bowl with the worst pass defense in the football. That's only sports though. Rooting for your team is always a happy illusion until reality crashes the party, besides they have to play the games anyway.Who knows? miracles happen so I'm more than willing to embrace the dumb. Go Pats! The three drunk twenty somethings leaning on my back though were another story.

Great place, but also a home for nitwits.

Leaning on people sitting at a bar is not cool so I feel no remorse about listening in on their conversation. They were, apparently in no particular order, hot for the bartender and beer aficionados. The Grog, like every bar I've been in for the past 10 years, had about 5 old standbys on tap. Guinness, Mmmm Guinness! a light dry beer with a creamy head that they get from adding nitrogen at the tap, Samuel Adams lager, Mmmm Sam Boston lager! Smooth and bitter with a complex flavor that is very assertive compared to the lagers brewed at large American breweries, Sam Adams winter lager which I will pass on because spiced cider is fine, but spiced beer is not my thing, Budwiser, Mmmm Bud! Clean, crisp, short on flavor compared to the Sam but perfect with food, A hefeneiezn whose manufacturer I do not remember, yuck! I don't want crap floating in my drinks ever ( take that Japan and your nasty bubble tea), and 2 Dogfish Head whatevers because you have to have a couple of beers from a cooly named creft brewery for the "afficianados". (For the purpose of this blog whenever I use the word afficianado feel free to substitute rube, or dumb-ass.)

The leader of team beer leaned over my shoulder, pointed at the 2 Dogfish taps, tried to channel his best  Barry White voice (sorry young-uns, if you don't know what I'm talking about take a listen) and asked the bartender which of the 2 was the hoppiest. Hoppiest, really? Dude, even if you knew what you were talking about saying hoppiest made you sound dumb. She shrugged then offered him a taste of both. What followed was lots of Hmm m's, lip smacking and what sounded like gargling. All right over my head. Finally he pointed at a tap and after mentioning how nicely sweet that beer was ( hops make beer bitter so maybe I missed something) he ordered 3. $36 dollars for a round of 3. He didn't even have enough money to tip his future wife. Rube.

I kind of feel bad for the kid. Getting robbed by bars for the privilege of being a pretentious ass seems like a bad way to spend your younger years, and what about the bartender? If that whole beer snob thing had worked would he be better off or worse off than when he started? ( Ladies I am curious, when you work as a server and you are trapped and some stranger uses that as a chance to pitch woo is it always annoying? a good way to boost your tips? or something you consider on a case by case basis?)

$36. You can still buy a pretty good meal for $36 dollars. More importantly, which is the crux of the matter, can any beer be 2 1/2 times better than a Boston Lager, or 3 1/2 times better than a Bud? I'd ask Bill Clinton or Herman Cain, but it seems they had a waitress trapped at one of the booths in back. Me? I was drinking 16 once PBR's.

Well, that's BS but at $3 for a 16 once can who am I to complain?

Go with what you like, but more importantly know what you like. Do I think PBR is a better beer that a Sam? Nope. Does it matter if what I'm after is crisp, cold and cheap. Nope. Think about things a little, it all comes clear if you do. Like Thanksgiving... best... holiday... ever.

The three F's, food, football, and family.

I think a lot of people don't appreciate Thanksgiving enough because their Mom didn't make enough side dishes. Turkey, stuffing, and mashed potatoes are awesome, but one plate is never enough so I'll try to throw you a couple of my own favorites these next 2 weeks.

Sweet potato hash, for when you are a grownup and putting marshmallow in your food seems like a bad idea.

Break out your cast iron skillet. Go to your fridge and take out the four sweet potatoes you baked off last night. Hey, it was a do ahead while you were making pies. Dice them into 1/2 inch cubes.

1. Cook 2 strips of bacon, Mmm bacon! on medium heat until they are crisp. Drain on a paper towel.
2. Leave the bacon grease in the pan then add 2 tablespoons of butter. Mmm butter!
3. Watch the butter, Mmm butter! when it stops foaming add a diced shallot and a tablespoon of chopped sage.
4. Keep them working for 3 or 4 minutes then add the sweet potatoes.
5. Salt and Pepper now.
6. Give it a couple of good stirs to mix then leave it alone for 5 minutes so it will crisp up.
7. Stir again, then leave again. Crisp is good. Mmmm crisp.
8. Crumple in the bacon, stir and serve.

The whole thing takes 20 minutes if you prep things the night before. Twenty minutes is how long you should let the turkey rest after you take it out of the oven and cover it with foil. Serendipity? One bite and only the most hard assed veggie haters will say no.

Blanc Poubelle Bistro

Pardon my french. Last week I got riled because we can be a huge steaming pile of numbskulls. Too true.  We (excuse me while I paraphrase rip-off my own comments section) love people that make us sad, elect people that steal our money, buy stuff that is a complete fraud, and do the same things over and over expecting that this time the results will be different. Sadly after a little further research I found that we are sort of wired to do those things. Well, Duh! With all due respect to the scientists in the crowd we also can over come those things if we work at them. Your body wants to be fat. If your male your body wants to spread your genetic material to as many places as possible (never sit on my couch without putting down a towel first). If you're a woman once a month your body messes with all kinds of regular chemical processes and can make you sick to boot. Yet the world is full of thin people, there are millions upon millions of faithful men ( as my couch will attest, thank god for Scottish guard), and pretty much every woman I have ever know does not turn into a raging basket case once a month. We beat our biology all the time and with the right kind of effort we can fix our bad thinking, we can admit we're wrong, we can understand risk, calculate probability correctly, embrace new facts, if only we push hard. I do mean hard, it's hard to be thin, it's hard not to sleep with everyone you can, it's hard not to be cranky when your body is flooding your brain with hormones while also making you sick. No one said it was going to be easy.

Because learning has its' ups and downs...

... But you have to wonder about who decided that taking that picture was a better idea than removing the kid from  a bowl of sewage. Ahh internet, you expose the Duh! At our very core. That's why we're going to start with food. Good food is about good cooking. Good cooking is all about methods, it is not about expensive ingredients. Throw a filet mignon into a pot of boiling water and you can eat it but it is going to suck. Pan fry a rack of ribs and you can eat it but it is going to suck. Bake Dover sole without adding fat and you and you can eat it but it is going to suck.  Well, we're going to take some cheap ingredients and make ourselves gourmet breakfast.

Why it's almost not food at all.

You have three basic possible problems when you cook meat. 1) You paid a lot of money for lean and tender. Lean and tender doesn't like too much heat or you get dry and tough. This defeats the purpose of spending the big bucks in the first place. 2) You paid less money for tough and fatty. Tough and fatty needs plenty of alone time with the heat, gentle wet heat, or they stubbornly stay tough and fatty. This defeats the point of trying to save money because suck never makes anyones day. 3) You paid a moderate amount of money for lean and tough. Now you need to use the right prep methods on top of using just the exact right amount of heat or you get Scottish/Irish food and a leg up on trying to stay thin.

Spam is none of the above. It is very fatty which is good for flavor but is very tender because it has been pre-chewed by a machine. Pre-chewed is not appetizing as anyone that has thrown-up instinctively knows.

What? Did you think I would show a picture of vomit?

So moving forward the first thing we need to do is think of a way to restore texture to our pseudo-food. Put your cast iron skillet on medium heat. Take 2 cans of spam. Cut one 12 once slab into 12 1 once slices. Take the other slab and cut it into a 1/4 inch dice. Start with the slices, cook them over medium heat five minutes to a side until they are well browned on both sides. Set aside, don't worry, the stuff is junk. Reheating it won't hurt it. (Note: if you start the slices before the pan is hot the spam will render enough oil to make greasing the pan unnecessary.).) Now check the pan. If it looks dry toss in a couple of tablespoons of butter. Mmm butter! Now crisp up the diced spam. Once the spam is well on its' way to golden brown add a finely chopped onion. When the onion starts to caramelize add another tablespoon of butter. Mmm butter! Then add 2 tablespoons of flour. Stir. You are making a roux. Give it 2 or 3 minutes so the raw flour taste cooks off, then add a cup of whole milk, 2 or 3 shakes of tabasco, and maybe a little chicken broth or water if the sauce looks too gummy. Now you need a base to build a meal.

Grit cakes, if you didn't translate the title you should have realized by now that I am going all Nascar/ white trash on your butts. (White trash is a derogatory term that is not endorsed by the management of this blog).

Make a mess of grits. Actually do this the day before. Follow the directions on the box. Use chicken stock if you are a foodie, use milk if you are a southerner, or use water if you are boring. Eat some of the grits for supper.( a little read sauce, a little parmesan, just call it polenta instead of grits) Take the left-overs, add 8 ounces of shredded jack cheese and 2 tablespoons full of sniped chive. Mix, then spread everything in the bottom of a 13x9 pan. Cover with plastic wrap. Then weigh it down by inserting another pan. Put the whole thing in the fridge.

The next day you will find you can cut and remove slices of the grits aka grit cakes. Dip them in flour, dip them in egg, dip them in seasoned flour (salt, pepper, cayenne). Pan fry them in butter. While they are pan frying paint your browned spam with honey or maple syrup, or molasses, or just dust them in brown sugar. Broil until they just bubble. 1 or 2 minutes. Place a cake on a plate, add a slice of spam, and spoon some of the spam sauce over top. You'll have...

Oh yeah, I almost forgot the egg.

Over very easy would be good, but if you have one of those poaching things that makes perfectly shaped poached eggs that would be even better. More chives or some parsley is also a nice touch, but I was thinking upscale meal with downscale ingredient so how about topping with a quick saute of...

...Leeks. That's the beauty of vegtables. If you eat them in season they are always poor people food because they are always cheap. Poor people have no troubles eating if it's warm and they have access to land and water. Each serving of my gourmet breakfast costs about a $1.50. Dish it up in a fancy restaurant by a celebrity chef who knows to call the grits "grilled polenta," the spam "force meat" and you have yourself a $15 dollar entree.

You're only stupid if you impress yourself by its' cost and not by its' taste... and it will taste good.

Teach a Man To Fish

So I was thinking about partisan politics and I was getting myself all worked up. The left is center, the right is nuts, and I seem to be the only one that thinks like me. Obama fights terror by ignoring the borders of sovereign countries and droning a missile into some guys ass. You may even be thinking, " What's the big deal? He snuffed a terrorist, get over it." OK, if you are cool with that would you have been cool with the British air force bombing South Boston back in the 70's. WTF are you talking about Blue Collar? I'm talking about terrorists, murderous muslim IRA terrorists, living with their peeps in a sovereign nation that was not at war with the nation that had been victimized by their murderous activities. I'm talking about that victimized nation saying, "Wanted Dead or Alive" then blowing the living crap out of them and too bad if you happened to be living on D Street when it happened. I'm not talking Apples and Oranges, I'm talking Apples and Apples and as you know from my last post I know my apples. I am sick to death of honor-less slaughter and justified criminality. Obama assassinates people the government has deemed a risk ( and how could that ever go wrong) while the anti-government right wing frets that W's torture of prisoners doesn't get the proper credit it deserves. What happened to us?

So then I'm sitting at Al's diner enjoying a humungous barnyard sandwich (ham, sausage, bacon, Mmm bacon! 3 eggs over on a Piro's Italian stick with plenty of black pepper and tabasco. My butt hates me almost as much as my arteries do). When I saw an interesting article on the front page of the Sunday Globe. Seems the intrepid Globe spotlight reporters went to over 70 restaurants, copped some of their fish, and had it tested in a lab. Over 40% of the samples weren't the species that were listed on the menu.

Now you might not even care as long as it tastes good, or you might be angry at the government for not regulating the restaurant industry properly ( although regulation is bad as any talk radio listener can tell you and the government is too busy blowing people up to check the local sushi bar) but me? My take on reading the story is that the Globe got bored. There is no mention of people calling to complain about getting substitute fish. No mention of the heartbreak of finding Mrs Paul's fish sticks under your burre blanc sauce instead of chilean sea bass. Not a word from the aficionados of the food network, who revel in the purchase of the "proper ingredients" for an "authentic" dining experience. $32 dollars for pan seared Dover soul? The best is worth extra of course! Why didn't anyone complain? Because a nation of Dumb asses revel in appearance and perception while never bothering to actually think or learn.

Looks like a democrat, thinks like a republican, fancies himself an independent.

How are we ever going to get our priorities straight on the world stage when can't even eat diner without getting our heads stuck up our asses? "That's not me!" you say? Of course it is. We're all too willing to be ridiculous food snobs, or music snobs, or designer snobs, braying about the value of something authentic, high quality, it's worth the money, blah, blah, blah, when we can't actually tell the difference between the silk purse and the sows ear.

I'm telling you it's Louis Vuitton!

Fact: The quality inspectors for Louis Vuitton bags cannot tell the difference between their bags and cheap counterfeit knockoffs. Fact: A study of wine tasting professionals had them rating the same wine differently when they were given different asking prices. ( Surprisingly the higher the price the higher the rating) Fact, walk into your jeweler with a highly polished industrial diamond and he can't tell you, no matter how hard he looks, if it came from a machine or the ground. Fact: the vast majority of people will prefer Mrs Butterworths maple flavored syrup over actual maple syrup. This has nothing to do with the unsophisticated palates of the masses and everything to do with the fact that real maple syrup is much thinner than the fake stuff and also has a distinct tree taste underneath the maple. Fact: that Dover sole you paid $25 a pound for could have been $7 a pound flounder and if you were a good cook ( actually if you were a bad cook too) it wouldn't make a particle of difference as far as your enjoyment of your dinner was concerned. Now the Globe is saying there was a 50/50 chance it was flounder, still glad you paid $25 per pound? Don't even get me started on art, or jazz, or pop culture. Get over yourselves.

The easiest way to do that is to eat something wicked good and by wicked good I don't mean expensive I mean cooked well, the right method for the right ingredients. It's fall, the weather is getting colder, which makes me think I might skip Al's this Sunday for Maggie's out on Plum Island. They have fish cakes for breakfast, Mmmm fish cakes. New England cold weather food and all you need is whatever flaky fleshed fish is the cheapest.

Now a traditional New England fish cake would actually be a cod cake, but if you read the Globe article the cod you buy is often substituted with cheaper pollock or whiting. So we're going to go right for the pollock to start with. If you want to get extravagant and jazz up your fish cakes buy a pound of Finnan Haddie (smoked haddock for those of you that didn't know) it will cost you $15 or $16 dollars a pound but a third of a pound will add a ton of flavor to your cod cakes and you can put the left overs in a big bucket of fish chowder.

1. Start with a pot of well salted water, it should taste like the ocean. Poach a pound of Pollock or Whiting until it breaks easily with a fork. (now to poach you want your water just at a simmer. There should only be a few random bubbles breaking the surface).
2. Set the fresh fish aside then poach the Finnan Haddie if you are using it. When it starts to flake set it aside.
3. Turn the heat up to high. Add 2 potatoes peeled and cut into uniform pieces. The smaller the better because we are trying to capture some of that fishy goodness that we lost to the poaching water.
4. While the potatoes cook flake all the fish.
5. Mash the potatoes with a tablespoon full of butter. Mmmm, butter!
6. Add a tablespoon of sniped chives, a tablespoon of chopped parsley, a finely minced shallot, 2 beaten medium or 1 beaten extra large egg and 2 or 3 shakes of your favorite hot sauce. Tabasco is fine.
7. Mix thoroughly.
8. Add the fish. Fold it in, easy, you want some texture. Mmmm, texture!
9. Dig in with your hands, make 6 or 8 burger sized cakes.
10. Coat the cakes with either seasoned flour (salt, pepper, cayenne) seasoned fine ground corn meal (salt, pepper, cayenne) or bread crumbs.
11. Let the firm up in the fridge for at least an hour, or over-night if you are having them for breakfast.
12. Heat 1 tablespoon of olive oil and 1 tablespoon of butter (combining them raises the smoke point of the butter) in a non-stick frying pan. (cast iron for the brave, these can be sticky so if you use your cast iron pan the oil has to be shimmering and you have to wait until a crust forms or they will stick).
13. Move them to a 200 degree oven if they need to stay warm while you prepare other stuff.
14. Now I would serve these with homemade baked beans, some over easy eggs, lemon and more hot sauce, or turn them into muffin-less benedict with Canadian bacon on the plate, then the fish cake, then a poached egg, then some hollandaise. Hell yeah you can still have some beans!

I'm not a fool. I know there are a lot of people in this world that want America dead. I also know that playing fair, or being one of the righteous,  does not equal success, or even survival, in this life. Still, doesn't some nation, somebody, have to try if we are ever going to be better. In the 70's South Boston was crawling with IRA and that worked out with no fly overs from the British. Shouldn't we at least be thinking about it? Are we just a bunch of shallow dumb-asses? Or am I just a damn dirty hippy? A hippy with delicious fish cakes.

Apples!

I love me some apples. They are easily the big wazhoo of the produce world. They have a longer season than oranges, keep better than peaches, don't skunk as quickly as pears, there is no health concerns from incontinent farm hands like there is with melons, you aren't going to break out in hives like you might from strawberries, unlike plums and nectarines they are pretty much loved by everyone, and you can do a million things with them besides enjoy their awesomeness straight up. Plus you can nullify all those darned health benefits with just a little imagination. Mmmm, imagination! Finally apples are probably one of the last foods you can enjoy locally without paying a fortune. Beef is from Colorado, tomatoes are from Mexico, pork is from South Carolina, chicken is from factories, oranges are from Florida when they are not from California when they are not from Chile, shrimp is from China, 90% of most peoples food is from packages. So why are we so fat when the food we eat tastes so dull? If I'm going to be fat it better be  from uncontrolled deliciousness.

America, the streets are paved with...food?

So I went apple picking Sunday. I've been sick so I had to put it off till now and now is almost too late. Seasons passing and such, damned clocks. Plus it is incredibly hard to get anyone to go apple picking with you. Men think its gay ( sorry gay people, but they do), going by yourself seems weird ( families rightfully hurry the children past the lone man in the apple orchard) women either want to bring all of the kids ( which is fine, I even recommend it, just leave me out of it) or turn it into an event that involves shopping, dinner, hayrides, crafts, and potpourri. ( Always with the God damn potpourri).  I just want to go out, get a big bag of fresh apples, eat the equivalent of a second big bag of fresh apples, then maybe pick up some cider and some hot cider donuts, Mmm cider donuts, and... Oh yeah,  help the Everett people lost in the freaking corn maze. ( blame it on GPS, Massachusetts had its' first corn maze crisis this year) .

So you chumped your friends into going apple picking with you, you have a large bag to fill, and there are twenty kinds of apples to choose from, what do you do? You pull out a squirt bottle ( one pint water, eighth of a teaspoon bleach, what! You have to wash them before you eat them) and some napkins and you sample the wares. Duh, of course they are all apple flavored, they're all apples. Didn't you ever wonder why there are so many different varieties? They taste different, they have different textures, they're useful for different kinds of eating. Now's your chance to compare, you can't compare when you have a bag from the supermarket that only has one kind in it, and supermarkets frown on sampling ( I found that out as a child during the big market altercation of 1968. Sorry Food Fair, sorry New Jersey, I was just a kid). You are in an orchard, carpe deium.

Red Delicious, Yuck!

The apple everyone thinks of when they think of apples. This is why they suck. Sweet with no real apple flavor they don't hold up well to cooking. They also go mealy on you if you don't eat them right away. Don't waste the room in your bag.

Golden Delicious

Tastes better than the Red Delicious even if it is still ungodly sweet. It also doesn't hold up well. Makes a great apple butter, Mmmm butter, though.

1. Peel, core and finely dice 5 or 6 pounds of golden delicious apples.
2. Add 4 cups sugar, 2 teaspoons cinnamon, 1/4 teaspoon ground clove.
3. Put the whole mess in a crock pot.
4. Cover and cook on high for an hour.
5. Turn to low and cook at least 12 more hours.
6. Uncover and cook on high for another hour. Whisk if you want them smooth. Time this so it is not 3AM. Duh!
7. Cool the apples, place in sterile covered containers. Of course sterile, Duh!

This stuff will keep for weeks in the fridge, makes a sort of healthy spread for bread and toast, can be used as a substitute for butter in vegan baking, or used as a condiment with a big grilled pork chop.

Braeburn, now we're getting somewhere.

Firm flesh that gives a burst of sweet upon first bite then tarts up as you eat more Braburns are indistinguishable from my first girlfriend. A perfect lunch box apple their smaller size makes them perfect candidates for caramel apples

1. Wash and dry a bunch of braeburn apples.
2. Put one pound of caramels in a microwave safe bowl. (unwrap them please)
3. Add a couple tablespoons of whole milk.
4. Microwave on high for 30 seconds, stir, repeat, until you have pourable (sort of ) caramel.
5. Jab a pointed stick into the apples bottom ( a practice that caused my first girlfriend to break up with me). Then while tipping the bowl roll the apple in the caramel.
6. The caramel is still pretty sticky so nows the time to roll the apples in crushed cookies, chopped nuts, coconut, candy bits, etc, if you are so inclined.
7. Or just put them on a tray covered with no stick foil. It works way better than wax paper.
8. Tuck 'em in the fridge so the caramel hardens.

Now for most people that would be enough. Nah! Let them harden.

1. Take one pound chocolate chips, or chop one pound of bittersweet chocolate and place in a microwave proof bowl.
2. Add 2 tablespoons of light corn syrup.
3. Microwave on high for 30 seconds, stir, repeat until you have a pourable chocolate coating.
4. Then tip the bowl and roll the apples in the coating.
5. The coating will set pretty quickly, so if you want to roll the apples in crushed cookies, chopped nuts, coconut, candy bits, etc, work fast.

If you work fast they will look like...

Remember, Americans need more fruit in their diet.

Granny Smith, for when you want to make pie.

I can't make pie. My pie crust sucks. If I did make pie I would use Grannys. Firm flesh that will stand up to heat, tart taste that won't become cloying from added sugar, and loads of pectin so the pie comes out in slices instead of glops. You didn't know why your pies are runny? All fruit contains pectin. It's the stuff that makes fruit jellies jellify ( not a real word but you know what I mean).  Of coarse you could just skip the pie and go for...

Remember, Americans need more fruit in their diet.

1. Peel and core 4 or 5 Granny Smith apples.
2. Fry the apples over medium heat in butter, Mmmm butter!, until they start to brown. Then throw in a fist full of brown sugar, a sprinkle of cinnamon, and a pinch of salt.
3. Butter, Mmmm butter!, a 9 by 13 inch pan.
4. Add the apples.
5. In a bowl mix a cup of oatmeal, a cup of brown sugar, a half cup of flower and a cup of softened butter, Mmmm butter! When the stuff starts looking like wet sand fold in a big handful of toasted nuts. I don't care what kind, it's not a big deal.
6. Spread the crisp mix over the apples.
7. Bake in a 375 degree oven for twenty minutes, drizzle with honey, and bake for 20 minutes more.

I'm thinking vanilla ice cream. Maybe whipped cream. Why not both?

Gala's 

Gala's are excellent at holding their shape so they make for a great side dish. Suppose you had a big grilled pork chop and you wanted something a little more substantial than apple butter. You could cut a bunch of gala apples in half, paint their cut side with melted butter, then throw them on the grill. Give them 3 minutes then turn 90 degrees and grill 3 minutes more. You should have a nice cross hatch pattern now. Flip them over, sprinkle them with fresh thyme, then shredded jack cheese. Close the lid until the cheese in all bubbly. Serve with the pork and maybe sweet and sour red cabbage.

Remember, Americans need more fruit in their diet.

Apples, who says they have to be good for you?
It's time for Octoberfest.

100 Posts!

So it looks like I am going to live to blog again. When I started doing this I actually thought that my shining intellect, quick wit, and impeccable culinary skills would soon make me a web sensation. Instead I am only 2,534,276, page reads from being as popular as "Kitten Falls Off of TV". That's alright. I was a Red Sox fan from 1966 to 2002. It made me smart enough to know that failing is what mostly happens, but it makes winning once in a while all the sweeter. Besides, I have to keep doing this blog, it gives me a way to vent.

Angry goofy people in funny clothes. Where have I seen that before...?

Is everyone in America a self absorbed tool?

When people in other countries protest they come armed for bear, because they want to rip the roof off that sucker. Mubarak, he's got to go! Chinese government screw your tanks! Gaddafi you're a dead man! Life and death hangs in the balance and real change means maybe the collapse of the whole political system. In the USA vaguely disappointed people fuss because things aren't going exactly as they envisioned them. The media shows up, finds the dumbest most narcissistic buffoon in the crowd, makes them the spokes-person for the whole movement, and pretty soon we are listening to a teenager dressed as a sea turtle or an old timer dressed like Paul Revere explaining Macro Economics. Better still the teen and the old timer are mad about the same things but are enemies to each other because... well, because they're stupid.

The NRA has it right. Start writing letters. Start sending e-mails. Then back it up with your vote. We want congress to regulate derivatives. We want our money that was invested in the TARP to be invested in American jobs. We want you to go in a room and not come out until everyone has affordable health care. We want Larocco to shut up about politics and do more recipes. Protests and sit-ins are perfect for single issue fights. 8 Hour day! End the War! Not for fighting a vague malaise about the direction the country is taking.

I would like to point out that while all the occupy Wall Street stuff was going down Obama executed an American citizen who had never been convicted of anything with a drone strike in a neutral foreign country. We go where we want and we kill who we want just because. OK, he was a bad man, but do you really want the president to have that power? All you small government right wingers?...anybody? How about you lefties that called Bush a Fascist?...Hello?

The people in charge are laughing at us and nothing anybody has done this week changes that.

I'm not some kind of to pure for the real world dreamer either. I'll be working for Elizabeth Warren this election cycle, even though she was picked and paid for by the White House and the DNC to get Kennedy's seat back from Scott Brown. Can't leave things up to the natives can we? The MA tribe has always been good for democrats...well until recently. Even when I like a candidate I don't want other people picking them for me, but liking something and making it work are two different things.

This is kind of a weak post, but hey, I've been sick. Next week, Apples! Until then I've picked out a few posts that I liked. Here they are...

http://downhill411.blogspot.com/2011/05/business-as-usual.html

http://downhill411.blogspot.com/2011/03/party.html

http://downhill411.blogspot.com/2011/07/great-idea.html

http://downhill411.blogspot.com/2011/04/it-was-long-week.html

http://downhill411.blogspot.com/2011/04/work-part-2.html

http://downhill411.blogspot.com/2011/09/hard-work.html

http://downhill411.blogspot.com/2011/07/important-stuff.html

It's Just a Cough.

Well, it's October 3. I was going to post about apples. I was going to post about the Berkley Jazz festival. I was going to post about the Red Sox. I definitely wasn't going to post about health care. That was all before the cough. Calling it a cough makes it sound bigger than it is though; actually it is more of a cou... just a little tickle really. It first made itself known in a meaningful way around September 15. I worked that day, felt very mild flue like symptoms, then started to cou... when I tried to go to sleep. Cou...Cou...Cou... it was a tickle, a minor nuisance, but it kept me up all night. I didn't even have anything to treat it with. Hell I haven't been sick in 3 years at least. I'd get something tomorrow.

Sept 16th, 6PM: I almost didn't go to the CVS. I felt fine all day. A little tired from no sleep maybe but not bad. Figured I'd fall asleep exhausted and everything would be fine the next day. I went anyway. What do you do though? There are like 40 different over the counter medicines and treatments for a cough and none for a Cou... how do you choose? I looked all over for someone official but the best I could do was a lady behind the cash register who also works at the Market Basket. Where are the shaman and the witch doctors when you need them? She said Nyquil. OK Nyquil it is. It'll be fine. I dose myself with some 40 proof healing and this little nuisance is history.

Sept 16th, 11PM: Cou...Cou...Cou... Time for more Nyquil.

Sept 17th, 1AM: Cou...Cou...Cou... I got to wait the directions say 4 hours.

Sept 17th, 3AM: Cou...Cou...Cou... Can't take the stuff now I have to go to work. So what, I tough it out then bring in the heavy guns tomorrow. Who needs sleep.

Sept 17th, 7AM: It's a Saturday job, but it is an easy one. That's good because the Cou...Cou...Cou... has followed me into the daylight. It still isn't much though. It doesn't even make my throat hurt. The only other symptom is being really, really tired from no sleep.

Sept 17th, 5 PM: I go back to CVS. This time I look more carefully and realize there is cough suppressant Nyquil and regular Nyquil. I also buy Hall mentholated cough drops. Bringing out the big guns.

Sept 17th, 6 PM: The cough drop finishes off my Cou... almost as soon as it starts to de-solve. High Five, problem solved. I won't even need the Nyquil.

Sept 17th, 6:30PM: As soon as the drop is gone the Cou... is back. Crap.

Sept 17th, 8PM: Nyquil and bed. I am exhausted.

Sept 17th, 9PM: Cou...Cou...Cou...

Sept 17th, 10 PM: Cou...Cou...Cou....

Sept 18th, 12PM: Cou...Cou...Cou... More Nyquil. Try and find a position where the Cou... doesn't come. Sitting up is best, with a drop in my mouth. What if I fall asleep and swallow? I don't want to die one of those joke deaths that earns you a headline in the Enquirer. I drag a living-room chair into my bedroom.

Sept 18th, 9AM: This is cool. I'll  just make like it's a sick day even though it is a Sunday. Plenty of hot liquids, cough drop every hour, I'll be fine for work tomorrow. I can catch up on my TV. Sox lose, Pats win. Not a bad day.

Sept 18th, 8 PM: A friend recommends Theraflue. I don't fell like running to CVS right now so I'll wait until tomorrow. No real coughing all day anyway. I've got this thing licked. Finally.

Sept 18th, 9PM: Cou...Cou...Cou... "Oh come on! Are you kidding me!" Cou...Cou...Cou...

Sept 18th, 11PM: It stops when I get in the chair, but the chair isn't comfortable enough for me to sleep in. I try to build something out of cushions on the bed. No luck. My engineering skills aren't up to the task.

Sept 19th, 2AM: Cou...Cou...Cou... I'm sitting in my chair ...awake. The night is crawling by.

Sept 19th, 6AM: I don't miss work. I just don't. I went 8 years once without taking a sick day. Besides, I don't feel sick. I'm just really, really , really run down. A little theraflue, a little sleep, and I'll be fine.

Sept 19th, 8PM: Ah, Theraflue, very lemony. The steamy liquid getting in every which way. Finally.

Sept 19th, PM: Cou...Cou...Cou... it's not even a cough God Damn it! It's a tickle!

Sept 20th, PM: Cou...Cou...Cou..."OK, OK I'll go to the doctor, just please can I sleep, please?" I don't even know who I'm begging to, but whoever it is they aren't listening.

Sept 21th, 6AM: I call out from work. I just started this job so I don't even have any sick days yet. Sweet, $250 out the window.

Sept 21th, 8AM: I find out my Doctor's office doesn't open until 9AM.  Real hours for a real job. I have forgotten what that is like.

Sept 21th, 9AM: "The Doctor can't see you until tomorrow, would you like to schedule an appointment" "It will cost me a lot of money if I miss another days work can I go to an emergency room or a walk in center?"

Sept 21th, 11AM: Oops, the copay at the emergency room is $150 not $20 like at the doctors office. It'll be worth it, I have to sleep.

Sept 21, 2PM: That was a long, long wait, and I'm pretty sure the doctor that looks at me is the same guy who cuts the deli meats at the White Hen Pantry on route 110, but now I have antibiotics, Robotussin, the prescription kind I'll have you know, and an inhaler. $60 copays worth of modern medical wonder. Can sleep be far behind?

Sept 21, 11PM: Cou...Cou...Cou...

Sept 22, 12PM: OK, OK I'm sitting in the chair.

Sept 22, 12:05 AM: Cou...Cou...Cou... Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

Sept 22, 12:06 AM: I trash my room... with malice... just because...

Sept 22, 1AM: Cou...Cou...Cou...

Sept 22, 6AM: How bad can work be? I'm not even sick. I just have a tickle in my throat.

Sept 22, 11AM: Bad, really bad. The other guys must really like me because they are doing my work for me. I'm detached and groggy, I won't drive or operate machinery. I showed up and they can charge for me, but I can't do any actual work.

Sept 22, 10PM: Cou...Cou...Cou...

Sept 22, 11AM: Cou...Cou...Cou...

Sept 23 2AM: Cou...Cou...Cou... Now sitting up doesn't matter any more the Cou... keeps on coming. Screw you God! I still won't worship you!

Sept 23 2:30 AM: Please God, please! Just a little sleep?

Sept 23 2:40 AM: Cou... Cou... Cou... Shit!SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!

Sept 23 6AM: Off to work. I'm fine.

Sept 23 7AM: No, no I'm not.

Sept 23 9PM- Sept 25th 11PM: Cou... Cou... Cou... @%&#$@!* Cough $%^@!@#$###@ Red Sox &^((!@@#$@%#$%^& Patriots !@@#$$#$$%%^%^^&&(!@!@!@##$$@##$% I'm fine! I'm fine! I just need to sleep!

Sept 26 12PM: Cou... Cou... Cou...

Sept 26 5 AM: THAT'S IT. I'M CALLING OUT! I'M GOING TO MY OWN DOCTOR!

Sept 26 9AM: The Doctor can't see you until tomorrow. Maybe the emergenc... Sir! I'm hanging up!

Sept 26 9:10AM: ...yeah, I'm really sorry. I know.... I'm reallly realllly sorry. Tomorrow at 2 PM. Thank you.

Sept 26 11PM: Cou... Cou... Cou... Just sit still. You can sleep. Calm, calm, Cou... Cou... Cou... Count sheep or something, just relax. You... will... finally... have... to... slee... Cou... Cou... Cou...

Sept 27 2PM: I've got you now. I've got more anti-biotics, I've got an inhailor, I had a chest X-ray, I've got cough syrup that required picture ID. Of course more anti-biotics will finish off what ever good bacteria I have in my system which means my next trip to the bathroom will be like trying to pass a brick. The Dr said to lay off the inhaler if it makes me jittery ( like too much coffee jittery? I have to sleep. Please, I have to sleep) How much will the X-ray cost? They didn't ask for a copay. Well, at least I have the party version of cough syrup...

Sept 27 10PM: ... if your idea of a party is dizziness and nausea. How can you possibly get hooked on this... look out toilet here I come?

Sept 27 11PM: Cou...Cou...Cou... cou... co... c... Zzzzzzz!

Sept 27 11:30PM: BOOM! Screw it, I'm not even going to clean it up. Zzzzz!

Sept 28 6 AM: Slept pretty good. A shower, then work. I can burn the mattress when I get home.

Sept 28 10AM: Damn that inhaler works well. Finally that dry raspy almost cough is giving way to...

Sept 28 10:15AM: Oh God! Where is all that goop  coming from? Why aren't I dead?

Sept 28 5 PM: This has to be the cure. Suddenly I actually feel sick. So sick there is no way I'm taking that cough syrup again.

Sept 28 10PM: Cough...Cough...Cough.... expectorate... Cough...Cough...Cough...

Sept 28 11PM: All right, maybe a little cough syrup.

Sept 29 12PM: Oh... My... God... You... Have... To... Be... Kidding... Me...!

Sept 29th 1AM: Zzzzzz, yeah, progress!

Sept 29th 6AM: I feel great. I'm, cured!

Sept 29th 5PM: Tired? sure. Beat up? Definitely. Beat it? You bet!

Sept 29th 10PM: Cou... Cou... Cou...


It is now October 3. I have lost $750 in wages, $290 in copays, I still don't have a cost for the X-ray. I can't taste my food. I finally slept the night through without narcotics and nausea last night. Three weeks of my life are gone. There are no ways to make informed decisions about health care. When you are really sick you become the most selfish bastard in the world. Sleep deprivation is absolutely torture. People rally around you when you are really in need, too bad they can't do anything for you and you are too sour and ungrateful to care. My doctor can go screw. It was just a tickle.

Never Forget

The front page of today's paper implored me to "Never Forget". How could I though, how could I ever forget being shocked, being afraid, being a witness to thousands of needless deaths? How could anyone ever forget? As usual it's not the right idea and it's not the way the world works. The memory will fade, not from lack of caring, not from neglect, not from indifference, it will fade because time and the universe are bigger and more important than we will ever be.  The years slip by, I can't stop them. The events I remember, the moon landing, Vietnam, the Cold War, smoking at work, 4 TV channels, Gilligans Island, Pop rocks, the Beatles have become millions of other peoples history. There are 60 million people in this country right now under the age of 14. How can we expect them to remember something they never experienced in the first place? Its text book to them. Pearl Harbor, 9/11; they mean something in the abstract but they will never "Remember" either.

Another headline for today was "The Day the World Changed". Changed? Changed for who?  Changed? 3,000 needless deaths and suddenly the world has changed? That's not change, that's any given Wednesday.  Changed? Hundreds, no thousands, of people went above and beyond what could possibly be expected of them. Change? No, we're human beings, that's how we can roll. Change?  From tragedy and fear came the opportunity to forge a new and better world. Change? Maybe next time. Maybe next time.

The head line should have read "What did you learn". Did we learn that pain and loss are a deeply personal thing that we shouldn't co-opt from the people that actually experienced it? Apparently not at our mass media. Did we learn that lashing out blindly in our pain and fear only creates more pain and fear? I hope so, but it doesn't look good. Did we learn that evil men do horrible things? I think we already knew that. Did we learn that the lesser of two evils is still evil? Call me when they close Gitmo.  Did we learn that shooting the bad guy in the face doesn't really bring closure? Did we learn the closure is psycho-babble bull crap that keeps people with useless degrees employeed? Did we learn that evening the score, 1 Bin Laden for 3000 innocents, only feels good in the movies? Did we learn to say, "Stop, we're not doing this anymore." If the worlds going to get better do we have a choice?

More importantly did we learn to call Mom more than once a week just because? Did we learn to hug our kids just a little bit tighter and read them an extra story just before bedtime? Did we learn that once we have enough money to buy all the ice cream we want we have enough money? Did we learn that a touch, a caress, an "I love you" in the fog on the bathroom mirror makes her day? Did we learn that you can't get a better meal than molten hot pizza and icy cold beer? Did we learn how great grass smells? Did we learn that every day we get out of bed is a day to savior?  Did we learn that it tastes better, sounds sweeter, feels warmer, looks nicer, and smells wonderful because it could all be gone in an instant?

I'll always remember 9/11. I can only read about Pearl Harbor. I can learn from them both. Today is a good day.

Hard Work

I hope everyone is enjoying their Labor Day cookout. Sometimes we forget why we have certain holidays. That's why I like Thanksgiving and the 4th of July. Even when you're just having the best time of your life you still know why you have the day off. Its fun but it means something. Christmas, Valentines, Presidents, Mothers, Fathers, they have all been co-opted by the mercantile class for the purpose of moving consumer goods. The worst though is the 2 holidays that bracket our summers. At least the right wing noise machine gets us to give a nod to our fallen soldiers even if they have lost sight of why the holiday was started in the first place. Labor Day is different. It has become the sad last hurrah before fall gets us back to work. ( Cause I just lounged around all Sumer. I think I missed the lounging.). But Labor Day isn't a send off to the summer, or a way to mark the beginning of school. Labor Day is about the kind of hard fought battles and sacrifice that brought this country to where it is today. Battles that are still going on and ground that we are losing to the corporations and the monied classes. The labor class in this country gets 2 holidays in the summer, Memorial Day marks our sacrifices to the God of War, Labor Day marks our sacrifices to the God of Commerce.

Fox News hates anything that smacks of class warfare. They are after all the voice of the productive class. The "job" creators who own the rest of us. I  don't hate them for preforming as their sponsors pay them to, but I hate it when their noise becomes solid enough ( rich people are job creators, single payer health care is evil socialism, we can't afford social security, safety regulations inhibit business, torte reform will stop those pesky lawsuits) for the rest of the mainstream media ( rich people all)  to run with it out of context and as if it were just common wisdom. It's not wisdom, its bullshit. People fought and died for our comfortable lives. Some we remember on Memorial Day, the rest we remember today. No, the rest are us.

1860: Pemberton Mill in Lawrence, MA collapses 145 workers dead.
1878: Washburn "A" Mill in MN has a dust explosion 18 dead.
1905: Grover Shoe Factory explosion, Brockton, MA 58 dead.
1907: Mononagh #6 +8 miunes WV, 362 dead.
1909: Cherry Mine, IL, 259 dead.
1911: Triangle Shirtwaist Factory, NYC, 146 dead.

1913: Stag Canyon #2, 263 dead.

1913: Great Lakes Storm of 1913 12 vessels sunk 255 crew dead.

1914-1927: US Radium Corporation, the radium girls

1940: Pond Creek Mine WV 91 dead

1947: Texas City Disaster, Munitions ship 578 dead.

1951: Orient #2, IL, 119 dead.

They get less as we reach our modern age, but that isn't because rich people suddenly decided that workers weren't expendable human resources ( when did we coin that term "human resourse" Hmmm? pretty resently if I'm not mistaken) It was from a long hard fight, and actual shooting war, that was fought all across this country and had very real casualties. Workers didn't even really start organizing in the US until the 1850s. So the post WW2 years of prosperity have been a drop in the bucket compared to the way labor has usually been treated.

1877: The battle of the Viaduct. Federal troops kill over 30 members of the Furniture Workers Union.
1885: 10 Coal mining activists are hanged in Pennsylvania.
1886: Bay View Tragedy, MN State militia kills 7 striking workers during a general strike for an 8 hr day.
1886: Chicago Haymarkets riots. 8 Police officers (police are workers too) killed by a bomb.
1887: Thibadoux massacre, Local militias in LA shoot 35 workers then lynch 2 labor activists.
1892: Homstead Strike, 7 pinketron guards and 11 strikers are killed.
1894: Pullman Strike, 34 members of the American railway union killed by state militia.
1897: Littimar massacre, 19 strikers killed by a sherifs department posse.
1902: Anthracite Coal Strike IL, 14 miners killed.
1904: Dunnville CO, 6 union members killed in a fight with state militias.
1912: Garbow riot, 4 timber workers killed in an armed confrontation with Galloway Lumber.
1914: Commission on Industrial Relations says that 35,000 US workers were killed in industrial accidents since 1900.
1914: Ludlow massacre, 5 men, 2 women, and 12 children killed by Pinkertons at a tent city for striking miners.
1916: Everett massacre: WA 5 IWW union men + 2 sheriffs department men killed.
1917: IWW organizer Frank Little lynched in Montana
1918: UMW organizer killed by Pinkertons.
1919: Centrailia Massacre, 6 killed, organizer Wesley Everest lynched.
1920: Matawan NJ, 7 Pinkertons, the mayor of the town and 2 strikers die during a gun battle.
1920: Battle of Blair Mountain: The police chief of Matawan, Sid Hatfield, is assassinated by Pinkertons for being a union sympathizer setting of a battle that included 5 to 10 thousand armed miners fighting the United States army. At least 200 people died.
1922: Herrin massacre: 32 people, mostly bystanders, are killed during a strike.
1927:Colombine Mine massacre: 6 miners killed by police.
1932: Ford Dearborn Strike 5 strikers killed.
1933: Pixley Cotton workers strike 4 killed.
1934: Auto lite strike OH 2 dead.
1934: Woonsockett RI textile strike 3 dead.
1937: Republic Steel massacre, 10 workers killed.

Then came WW2 and reform curbing the death toll. In all these confrontations I always try to distinguish if police or guards are among the dead because they are workers too. There is really only one enemy and that's the bastards who care more about profit than people. They have always ruled this world and they always will if we let them.

I am not a revolutionary. I don't have the balls or the disposition for it. I am a quick study though. Quick enough to know that the basic information laid out here coupled with the rhetoric coming out of the corporate noise machine suggests that we watch our backs. The "job creators" are feeling under appreciated, why someone might even try to regulate the banks again. Wages have been stagnant since the 70's. In 1991 20 women died in a fire at the Imperial Chicken Processing Plant in Hamlet NC. The doors to the building were locked from the outside.

Comfort and prosperity for working people has only been around for less than 100 years. It is slipping away. If you think the information you get from Fox, or any big media, or from your teachers for that matter, paints the true picture about labor you are just happily numb to the truth. My little outline doesn't come close to painting the big picture. OSHA recored 4,500 deaths in 2010. That's accidents, it doesn't include you breathing toxic chemicals or sitting in a hermetically sealed box with mold in the air-conditioning system, or getting a heart attack because you just sit and stress all day, or falling asleep behind the wheel of your car on the way home.

There is a class war going on in this country, it has been going on for a long time, and we are losing. If the corporations can suck in you libertarian types under the guise of freedom, or because you think your little contracting business makes you a player, or just because everyone on the left is a damn dirty hippy that's not as smart as you are, we are going to lose.

Mitt Romney is a venture capitalist, Barrack Obama never saw a banker he didn't suck up to. 261 members of congress ( that's half) are millionares. 68 Senators ( 2/3) are millionares. Representative of working people? Not a chance. It's on us. Enjoy the burgers.