Wiener's weiner

So I guess I was wrong, apparently it is a good idea to tweet your junk to the ladies. No wonder I go to so many events alone. Of coarse I'm not a Congressman, or a football star, so maybe a photo of my johnson wouldn't be as much of a draw as I think... and of course there is the added expense of the zoom lens I would have to buy.

"I wish I was a Football star"

"I wish I was a Congressman"

"It looks better in pictures when Pam Anderson is attached to it"

So we just got ourselves a full week of yucks about Wiener's wiener. That's cool, because by the next news cycle the psycho killer Mom in Florida will be on trial and we can switch over to smug moralistic musings about Mom's gone bad. The right wing will have plenty of time to puff up and bloviate about how "Killings to good for that bitch". Meanwhile liberals will quietly lay low because they secretly agree with the conservatives, or they will sprain something trying to distort the trial into a failure of our social services, justice system, schools... blah, blah, blah.

So that will dominate the news until Palin does a Playboy photo-shoot, or Obama wrestles a gator on the DC mall. Maybe there will be more tornados. That's always a good visual... weeping families shifting through rubble looking for the remains of their loved ones. Television news, there's no plot, but you have to watch anyway.

Mean-while the real stories end up buried in the newspapers that nobody reads any more. Like the interview congressional majority leader Eric Cantor gave that suggested the government shouldn't help the tornado victims until the money for the help was chopped from other programs. After all, if someone in a family has an accident you can't expect other members of the family to chip in money they don't have. Right? Government help, uncle Fred help, it's exactly the same thing, right?

"I don't need to tweet my junk because this is the picture of a dick."

 How about this. The Columbia Journalism Review ran a story that the Nation actually pulled from publication. The story was about how contractors for Hanes and Levis got the US State Department to prevent the Haitian government form raising the minimum wage for garment workers to over $3 a day. Since even in a dung hole like Haiti it costs $12.50 a day to not die this was a major set back for free market capitalism. $3? That's socialism. "They can take our $3, but they can never take our Freedom!"

How do you get a good vote when your capital looks like this?

 There is no real disputing the story because the Wiki leaks documents are pretty clear. Of coarse wiki leaks is a bad thing right? The people on Fox news, hell! all of the news, told me so. Why you never know what would happen if people found out that their government was working hand in hand with big corporations to crush poor people. So when you turn on your talk radio, or click on Fox, or kick back with the networks, or just ignore everything completely remember there's a reason you future doesn't seem as rosy as it once did, there's a reason why you paid billions of dollars to bankers,there's a reason your kids will never... Look! Lindsey Lohan!

"Nice tweet!"

Got to Walmart. Cover your junk with cheap under-drawers, then add a pair of cheap Levis.  Be glad that tornadoes whomped on other people. Then make sure you're on the right side the class wars. What could possibly go wrong?